Laisse-moi tranquille, vioque, t'es carrément dingue!

What?!

When on Earth did you decide this?

Oh my God, it can't be true. It can't possibly be true?

So are you a girl *** or a boy ***?

Do you know people who choose this go to Hell?

Is it because we abused you when you were a child?

Is it because we put too much stress on you?

Is it because you hate girls so much?

Is it because you were shy as a kid?

I cannot possibly have my eldest son be this way. You want to send me to an early grave, don't you!

You are the eldest son of your grandmother's eldest son. All of your aunts dote on you, we knew you were destined for success from the minute you could speak. How can they go to their graves peacefully knowing that you turned out this way?

Jesus didn't make you that way. If you think he did you are lying.

Don't lie to us.

Satan is lying to you. Stop listening to him!

If you kept praying, you might have changed someday, but you stopped praying, didn't you? Didn't you?

This is the most disgusting of all sins in the world. Don't you understand that? People like that go to Hell forever.

Do you know how they have sex? Imagine how disgusting that is! Why would you ever want to be one of them?

They must have brainwashed you somehow. You were a fool for believing them.

I will always be praying for you. Don't you know that we love you? We love you so much.

And Jesus loves you.

Always trust in Jesus.

Amen.

ça s'écrit aussi en plusieurs langues étrangères

Tous mes projets pour l'été sont allés en eau de boudin, et il n'y a presque rien que je peux faire afin d'améliorer cette situation vraiment minable. Je me souviens toujours du moment lorsque je suis tombé amoureux de lui, et pour quelques semaines mes yeux étaient remplis à ras bord d'étoiles, comme ceux d'un petit garçon que reçoit des cadeaux de Noël pour la première fois de sa vie.

Enfin il se trouve que ce n'était qu'une illusion, un rêve puéril qui ne pouvait se transformer en réalité. Personne ne sait comment ces choses vont tourner.

Et à propos de lui, le mec dont je n'ai pas encore fait la connaissance, bien que je l'aie rencontré plusieurs fois pendent ce trimestre dernier--- Puis-je recevoir la chance de le faire payer de retour mes sentiments? J'ai toujours l'impression qu'il reste bien au-delà de mes limites, mais si l'on ne garde pas d'attentes élevés à l'égard de l'amour il n'y a pas moyen de se tromper...

Qu'est-ce que je suis lâche! Je ne le mérite pas, et il se disparaîtra comme tous les autres.

toujours au bord d'une crise de nerfs

Old blog, new post.

I think it's been over a year since I've updated this darned thing, and I guess I need an outlet for most of my bottled-up emotions, which tend to manifest themselves through nasty psychosomatic symptoms such as migraines and heart palpitations.

So what's happened since then?

Well, let's see.

I moved into a studio apartment, made some booze, sank deeper and deeper into the recesses of my hatred and misanthropy, "accidentally" let my parents know I was gay, but stopped short of telling them I fucking despised their stupid religion. Disaster almost ensued, and for a while I thought I was safe from all this insanity and humiliation.

Nope. Fucking hell no. I should have known better, given my previous personal experiences! The whole fiasco fucking blew up in my face at the most inconvenient time possible. I am still reeling from the after-effects.

(You cannot "cure" me, you dumb bitches, because there is absolutely nothing to cure. When you die, I will ensure that you are committed to the cheapest retirement home I can find in south-central LA. There will be plenty of swarthy-looking people and absolutely nobody who speaks your native tongue.

I think someplace, deep inside my heart, I still love you, but since I fondly remember all of the crap you have put me through this year those subconscious feelings might as well not even exist.)

Somewhere along the way I found a boyfriend and broke up with him. I also changed my major, but I might change it back.

What happened to all the color and mystery in the world?